51 Best Funny Status for Whatsapp, Text

Here are the Best Funny Status for Whatsapp. Selectively available Funny Status in English

You’re a traffic signal, my friend. Your antiques always stop me in my tracks.

A gold watch is the most appropriate gift for retirement as it’s recipients have given up so many of their golden hours in a lifetime of service. – Harry Mahtar

When you retire, you switch bosses — from the one who hired you to the one who married you. – Gene Perret

First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. – Branch Rickey

funny status

I know I’m not supposed to text you right now, but my mind just won’t stop thinking about you.

When I first met you, I thought I just caught you in a really good day because you were looking so handsome. But now I know you are always so handsome!

I should have waited till you are free but I really couldn’t stop myself from texting you right now. I am missing you all the time!

How many more texts I have to send before I finally inspire you to make a move? Life is too short darling and I’m already dying for you to make it happen!

funny status

I thought I should prepare your favorite dish tonight and invite you over my house. Take it as a tribute to your handsomeness from me!

I really don’t see anyone worthier than you to spend my weekend with. Because no one can make me happier more than you do!

It’s a weird feeling that I have about you. I merely know you for a couple of days but it seems so hard for me to not think of you for a single moment!

It just took me a couple of days to discover the gems in you. I must be so lucky for finding you just the right moment in my life.

funny status

I am really missing your handsome face right now. Would you mind sending me a pic of it now?

Funny Status

A gold watch is the most appropriate gift for retirement as it’s recipients have given up so many of their golden hours in a lifetime of service. – Harry Mahtar

When you retire, you switch bosses — from the one who hired you to the one who married you. – Gene Perret

First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. – Branch Rickey

funny status

I’m really blown away by all your hot pics on Instagram. Don’t you think I deserve some originals too?

My friends are so tired of me praising your look and physique all the time. So, I decided to text you. Please don’t get bored!

I wish you were a blanket I could buy from the market. Because it’s so cold out here and I’m literally freezing right now!

You make my heart happy, and I know you get that I really like getting to know you. Let’s meet more often and take our chances.

funny status

I’m falling so deep down in love for you. Will you make a move to save me? Or is it just me making up some weird fantasies!

Maybe it’s crazy but can I call you my baby? Let’s just go for dinner after work tomorrow, what say? You pick the place.

Your computer screensaver is a scene from Green Acres – so you can daydream about that farm you always wanted. Make best use of it, have a happy retirement.

Happy retirement and my advice is that you do not try to say that you are coming back because you will be surprised at people’s reactions. No one will give back your office, nor your parking space. No one misses you that much.

funny status

Funny status in English

Retired people compliment my teeth, then tell me to take care of them. This always makes me think they are trying to steal them. – Emily Claire Tamblyn

When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. – R C Sherriff

People are always asking me when I’m going to retire. Why should I? I’ve got it two ways. I’m still making movies, and I’m a senior citizen, so I can see myself at half price. – George Burns

Retirement is wonderful. It’s doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it. – Gene Perret

funny status

I’m not just retiring from the company, I’m also retiring from my stress, my commute, My alarm clock, and my iron. – Hartman Jule

True friends don’t judge each other, they judge other people together

It’s been so many years that I have remained a friend with you. I wish you knew how hard it was for me to put up with your stupidity all these years!

It’s hard to not be a friend with someone who already knows all the dark secrets of you. Being friends with you is not a choice for me anymore; it has become an obligation now!

funny status
funny status

Once a stupid person made a great decision in life, that is to become a friend with someone equally as stupid as him. Congratulations!

I have all the quality of a great friend and more. You should really be feeling lucky everyday for having a friend like me in your life!

Thank you for making me realizes that I’m a loser. After all, who would choose to be a friend with someone so weird as you without a loser like me.

I heard that a true friend is someone who helps you hiding a dead body. I will manage a friend like that but will you be that dead body for me?

funny status

I don’t ever want a friend better than you, because I’m already fed up! You are a great friend but your craziness is beyond endurable!

I don’t ever want a friend better than you, because I’m already fed up! You are a great friend but your craziness is beyond endurable!

If we’re on a plane that was about to crash and there was just one parachute. I promise to give the best speech at your funeral.

Real Friend care like a MOM, Scold like a DAD, Teas like a SISTER, Irritate like a BROTHER, Love more than a LOVER.

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